Akhirnya Mengandung
Assalamualaikum admin. Tq kalau sudi publishkan. Harap berguna untuk pembaca. Sikit pengenalan, aku maria ( bukannnamansebenar) Umur masuk 3 series. Kawen hampir 5 tahun. Alhamdulillah akhirnya tahun ni Allah bagi rezeki untuk mengandung. Kawan kawan dan family semua teruja. Ramai juga yang tanya tips. Makan apa, buat apa. Jadi saya share sini. Semoga bermanfaat.
Masa sebelum dapat zuriat, kami suami isteri antara manusia yang trauma nak balik kampung. Tengok muka orang pon dah tahu depa nak tanya apa. Mak mertua pon sampai biru muka nak menjawab. Sebab kebanyakkan yng bertanya ni sedara sebelah suami. Tapi mak mertua, dari kami kawen sampai sekarang, sentiasa backup aku. Tq mak. Sayang mak. Mak aku? Mak aku rilek je. Haha. Nak cakap apa je. Lagi mental bila adik yang baru kawen, sepupu sepapat kawen je terus dapat baby. Lepas tu muka masing masing ada yang bangga ada yang serba salah. Bangga sebab dapat baby awal dari aku, serba salah sebab takut aku terasa. Awal awal dulu selalu jadi hindustan. Lari lari menangis dalam bilik. Tapi sekarang dah kental. Rilek je. Di bawah ni antara benda yang aku buat. Aku rasa benda ni la yang menyebabkan aku dapat rezeki ni.
1. Ubah perangai.
Aku jenis tak baik sangat. pemalas, suami suruh buat air pon aku malas, mulut lepas, suka kutuk dan mengumpat orang, sembahyang pon akhir waktu. Sehingga la aku terbaca artikel dan aku dengar ceramah. Ustazah tu cskap macam mana Allah nak bagi rezeki kalau diri kita sendiri tak berapa betul. Sembahyang tak. Agama lintang pukang. Pemalas. Rumah macam tongkang pecah. Bakal baby pon rasa tak sanggup nak dapat ibu yang macam tu. Lagi ayat dia, kalau kita tak sampai tahap solat tahajud atau menangis bila doa pada Allah, maksudnya kita ni tak sampai tahap betul betul nak. Jadi senyap senyap aku ubah diri. Susah wei nak berubah. Tahan mulut ni dari mengumpat, kalau nampak orang tak pandai parking, nak parking pon sampai 70jam, aku tahan dalam hati jangan kutuk orang tu. Kalau pekerja kedai slow buat kerja, aku tahan mulut dan hati jangan cakap apa apa. Aku nampak perempuan gedik gedik depan aku ketawa macam langsuir, aku tahan diri tak cakap apa apa. Aku nampak lelaki hensem dengan perempuan tak lawa, aku tak cakap apa. Aku tahan. Aku tahan. Aku tahan. Haha. the struggle is real bagi orang macam aku. Mohon jangan kecam. Aku tak perfect pon tapi suka buat gaya macam perfect sangat kahkah. Aku sekarang more to bersangka baik. Cakap baik baik pasal orang. Contoh kalau colleague aku datang cakap ” ko tau tak si gayah tu hari hari mc..tapi tengok status fb elok plak pegi shopping” aku jawab ” mm maybe tu yang doktor suruh dia buat” kahkah. Atau ” si mail tu baru je tunang tapi dah putus. Ko rasa kenapa?” Nampak pancingan untuk mengumpat. Tapi aku jawab ” takpe la bukan jodoh dia” haha. Ofismate pon malas jadi malas nak mengumpat bila aku asyik cakap macam tu je. Ok sambung
2. Paksa diri tolong orang
Biasa aku la paling malas nak tolong orang. Aku buat hal sendiri je. Tapi aku ubah. Kalau nampak makcik makcik takut takut nak cross jalan, aku tolong pimpin kan. Nampak pakcik pakcik konfius tengok date roti, aku tolong tengokkan. Nampak budak budak takde duit beli tiket lrt, aku tolong bayar kan. Nampak kedai full tapi ada yang tercegat lama, aku laju laju habiskan makan dan bagi seat pada dorang. Nampak makcik beratur beli goreng pisang, aku bagi turn aku pada dia. Tolong buka kan pintu, tolong angkatkan barang orang. Simple je. Tapi rasa macam tenang jiwa.
3. Sedekah.
Sedekah tak banyak pon. Kadang lepas ambil duit di bank, tengok ada makcik cleaner, aku salam dan selit duit. Nampak pakcik makan dengan cucu, aku bayarkan. Selisih dengan budak sekolah, aku bagi seringgit dua. Kalau makan di kedai, ada balance dua tiga ringgit, aku halalkan. Hujung bulan kalaunada rezeki lebih, aku buat makan makan. Atau kalau ada birthday ofismate, celebrate je dengan kek paling kecil ikut kemampuan aku time tu. Atau bagi hadiah contoh tudung yang beli di muaz. Haha. Aku tak kaya. Tapi nak cuba gembirakan orsng. Atau kalau nampak ofismate yang makin kurus, hari hari tak makan, aku sekali sekala belanja dia makan. Tapi jangan tiap hari, nanti aku plak yang tak makan. Setiap kali pegi masjid, WAJIB bagi yang paling besar dalam purse. Paksa suami buat macam tu juga. Sampai hari tu kami ada 50 je tapi aku bagi juga. Tak niat pon dalam hati semoga Allah bagi rezeki lain berganda ganda. Tapi niat, ya allah aku sedekah ikhlas kerana mu dan aku yakin Engkau menjaga kami seperti mana semut yakin dengan Engkau akan menjaga mereka. Aku buat macam tu sebab ada ustaz bagitau, buat apa apa kena ikhlas dan bukan harapkan balasan dari Allah. Contoh macam ko tolong perempuan dengan harapan dia sudi jadi awek kau. Confirm perempuan tu menyampah. Anggap la macam tu. Korang faham ke? Haha. Kalau tak faham, pandai pandailah.
4. Doa
aku amalkan doa Rabbana hab lana min azwajina wa dzurriyyatina qurrata a’yunin waj-’alna lil-muttaqîna imama.
Artinya, “Ya Tuhan kami, anugerahkan kepada kami, pasangan kami dan keturunan kami sebagai penyejuk hati kami, dan jadikan kami pemimpin bagi orang-orang yang bertakwa”. (QS. Al-Furqan: 74). cuba hayati doa ni sampai menangis nangis. Lain rasa dia. Lain. Korang cuba lah. Hari hari aku doa yang ini. Lepas solat dan kalau saja saja duduk, aku baca doa ni. Ustazah pesan, setiap kali doa, ko kena menangis. Paksa diri tu menangis. Lepas tu paksa mak ayah suami adik beradik dan siapa siapa je yang kau jumpa, untuk doakan kau. Doa orang pada kita antara doa mustajab. Betul dah aku rasa. Kalau silap, ampunkan daku. Kau doa pada Allah, kau nak zuriat kenapa? Niat elok elok. Nak ada zuriat sebab nak jadikan dia khalifah Allah. Pejuang agama. Yang mampu sumbang pahala pada kita dan keturunan. Nak zuriat sebab nak sama sama bina keluarga islami. Nak eratkan hubungan suami isteri. Nak peneman dan semangat untuk lebih dekat dengan Allah. Niat kena betul. Kalau ada terlintas dalam hati kau, nak zuriat sebab nak pakaikan baju lawa lawa, nak bertanding fengan orang, istighfar terus. Korang yang ttc macam aku ni kena set dalam kepala. Kita ni special kes, jadi kita kena buat betul betul.
5. Dekatkan diri dengan agama.
Tak perlu sampai jadi ustazah.. tapi hari hari kena paksa diri tu mengaji dan baca tafsir, paksa diri solat awal, paksa diri berdoa dan berzikir lepas solat. Paksa diri dan suami solat berjemaah. Jaga solat biar solat kita berkualiti. aku jenis mekap. Kalau nak solat, aku ambil je wudhuk tak basuh dulu mekap aku. Disitu air wudhuk bukan sah pon. solat aku? Lagi la tak sah. Aku terbayang solat yang tak berkualiti ni di campak ke muka macam kain buruk. Aku sekarang, pencuci muka sentiasa ada dalam beg. Senang. Lepas ni solat tanpa was was. Semoga Allah redha.
Rasa sampai sini je dulu. Point dia, nak sesuatu dari Allah, kena berbaik dengan Allah. Bergantung pada Allah 100%..kalau orang kata, bidan ni bagus, bidan ni hebat, jamu ni boleh bagi zuriat, jamu ni gitu gini. Istighfar dalam hati. Cakap pada diri, ya Allah aku hanya bergantung pada engkau bukan pada jamu dan bidan. Tapi dalam masa yang sama kita kena usaha juga. Berurut. Jumpa doktor. Jaga makan. Cuma kena sentiasa ingatkan diri, Allah yang berkuasa. Bila makan jamu, bila jumpa doktor bila jumpa bidan, betulkan dalam hati, ya Allah Engkau yang maha pemberi maha penyayang maha mengetahu maha berkuasa. Bukan mereka. Aku dok ulang ulang point sama. Supaya korang faham kebergantungan pada Allah itu penting. Ok gais. Semoga bermanfaat. Jangan sedih sedih. Perempuan selagi ada rahim, selagi itu ada chance untuk mengandung. Kalau takde rahim pon, kalau Allah nak bagi, kau siapa nak menafikan. Be positif, be kind, be sweet. Aku doakan korang yang tengah menunggu zuriat, diberikan rezeki zuriat. Aminnya rabbal.
Thanks
– Maria
Hantar confession anda di sini -> www.iiumc.com/submit
Finally pregnant
Peace be upon you admin. Thank you if you are willing to do it. Please be useful for readers. A Little Introduction, I'm Maria (Bukannnamansebenar) age in 3 Series. Married for almost 5 years. Alhamdulillah finally this year Allah gives sustenance to get pregnant. Friends and family are all excited. Many people ask for tips. Eat what, what are you doing. So I'm sharing here. Hopefully it will be useful.
The time before we get children, we are husband and wife among humans who are traumatized to go back to hometown. Look at other people's faces already know what they want to ask. Mother-in-law also reaches blue face to answer. Because most people ask this is the relatives beside the husband. But Mother-in-law, from us getting married until now, always backup me. Thank you, mom. Love you mom. My Mom? My mom is just relaxed. Haha. I want to say anything. More mental when a sibling who just got married, cousins get married and get a baby. After that there are people who are proud to have something wrong. Proud to have a baby early from me, it's all wrong because I'm scared of it. Early in the beginning, always became hindustan. Ran away crying in the room. But now it's strong. Just relax. Below is some of the things I do. I think this is what makes me get this sustenance.
1. Change your attitude.
I'm kind of not very good. Lazy, husband told me to make water pon I'm lazy, mouth off, like to curse and curse people, pray for the end of time. So I read the article and I heard the lecture. What kind of ustazah is God for sustenance if we are not true. Prayer is not. The religion of latitude pukang. Lazy. House like barge broke. I will be a baby I can't afford that kind of mother. Again, if we do not reach the stage of tahajjud prayer or cry if we pray to Allah, it means we will not arrive at the right stage. So quiet I change myself. It's hard to change. Hold this mouth from cursing, if people are not good at parking, nak parking until 70 hours, I hold it in my heart don't curse that person. If the shop worker is slow for work, I hold my mouth and heart don't say anything. I look like a girl gedik gedik in front of me laughing like a langsuir, I can't say anything. I see a hensem man with a woman not lawa, I don't say anything. I hold it. I hold it. I hold it. Haha. the struggle is real for people like me. Please don't slams. I'm not perfect but I like to make a perfect style. I am now more to think good. Say good people's article. Example if my colleague came to say " why do you know that's the day of mc day.. but look at fb status nice plaque go shopping " I answer " mm maybe that's what the doctor told him to make " kahkah. Or " the mail is just tunang but already broke up. Why do you think?" Looks like fishing for cursing. But I replied "takpe la not her mate" haha. Ofismate pon lazy to be lazy to curse if I'm fun to say that. Ok connect
2. Self Force help people
It's normal that I'm the most lazy to help people. I only do my own things. But I changed. If you see aunt, I'm afraid to be afraid to cross the road, I'll help you to lead it. See Uncle Uncle Konfius looking at the bread date, I help watch it. See kids who don't have money to Buy LRT tickets, I'll help you pay. Looks like the shop is full but there are some old caught, I quickly finish eating and give them a seat. Saw Aunt line up buying banana fritters, I gave her my turn. Please open the door, please raised other people's things. It's simple. But the soul feels calm.
3. Charity.
There's not much charity. Sometimes after taking money at the bank, see if there's Aunt Cleaner, I'm greeting and putting in money. Saw Uncle eating with the grandson, I paid. Difference with the school boy, I'll give you a second dollar. If you eat in the shop, there will be a balance of two three ringgit, I will make it. At the end of the month, I have more provisions, I make a meal. Or if there's a birthday blemishes, just celebrate with the smallest cake according to my ability at that time. Or give an example of the hijab that bought at muaz. Haha. I'm not rich. But want to try to make the orsng happy. Or if you see a blemishes that is getting thinner, don't eat every day, I'll treat him to eat once in a while. But not everyday, I'll be the one who doesn't eat. Every time I go to the mosque, it is compulsory to give the biggest in the purse. Forced the husband to do that too. Until that day we only had 50 but I gave it too. No intention in my heart may Allah give other provisions double. But intention, oh god, I am a sincere charity because of you and I am sure that you take care of us as the ants are confident in you will take care of them. I do that because there is a ustaz telling me, do whatever you have to be sincere and not expect a reply from Allah. An example like you help a woman with hope she is willing to be your girl. Confirmed that the woman is fed up. Think of it like that. Do you guys understand? Haha. If you don't understand, you'll be good at it.
4. Prayers
May God help us from our parents and our children, we are the one who is the one who is the one.
It means, "our Lord, grant us, our partners and our offspring as the cooler of our hearts, and make us a leader for the righteous". (QS. Al-Furqan: 74). Try to appreciate this prayer until crying. He feels different. Different. You guys try it. Every day I pray for this. After praying and if i just sit down, I'll read this prayer. Ustazah orders, every time you pray, you have to cry. Force yourself to cry. Then force your parents and siblings and whoever you meet, to pray for you. People's prayers to us are among the bleaching prayers. I feel it right. If it's wrong, forgive me. You pray to Allah, why do you want your child? Good intentions. Want to have a child because he wants to make him the khalifah of Allah. Religious Fighter. Those who are able to donate reward to us and offspring. Want a child because you want to build an Islamic family together. Want to tighten the relationship of husband and wife. Want a companion and spirit to be closer to Allah. The intention is to be right. If it comes to your heart, you want a child because you want to wear beautiful clothes, you want to compete with other people, keep istighfar. Those of you who are ttc like me have to set in the head. We are a special case, so we have to do it right.
5. Get close to religion.
You don't have to be ustazah.. but every day you have to force yourself to read and read the interpretation, force yourself to pray early, force yourself to pray and pray after praying. Force yourself and husband to pray together. Take care of your prayers so that our prayers are quality. I'm the type of makeup. If you want to pray, I'll just take it and don't wash my makeup first. There is no legal water there. My prayers? It's not valid anymore. I imagine this non-quality prayer was thrown into the face like a bad cloth. Me now, the face wash is always in the bag. Happy. After this praying without being. May Allah accept it.
I feel like I've been here before. The point is, if you want something from Allah, you must be kind to Allah. Depends on God 100 %.. If people say, this midwife is good, this midwife is great, this jamu can be given a child, this jamu is like this. Istighfar in the heart. Talk to yourself, oh god i only depend on you not on jamu and midwife. But at the same time we have to work too. Tandem. See the doctor. Take care of your food. Just have to remind yourself, God is powerful. When you eat jamu, when you see a doctor when you meet a midwife, correct it in your heart, oh god, you are the Almighty, the most merciful, the most powerful. Not them. I repeat the same point. So that you can understand what is important to Allah is important. Ok guys. Hopefully it will be useful. Don't be sad sad. Women as long as there is a womb, as long as there is a chance to get pregnant. If there is no uterus, if Allah wants to give it, who will deny it. Be positive, be kind, be sweet. I pray for those of you who are waiting for their children, given the sustenance of their children. Aminnya of the Lord.
Thanks
- Maria
Submit your confession here -> www.iiumc.com/submitTranslated
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