用字遣詞的敏感度
快來看Presentality的最新英語寫作分析~
特別敏感的時刻,我們的用字遣詞也要特別小心。今天的「閱讀筆記」,我們來看前一陣子轟動矽谷的事件:知名軟體公司老闆在部落格的一篇 po 文,讓三分之一員工離職。他到底寫了什麼?
📌 總結幾個重點:
1. 在敏感時刻,用字跟語氣,甚至可能比內容還要重要。
2. 用簡短無修飾的句子,會顯得比較強硬,較長而且有修飾的句子,反而比較溫和。
3. 主詞非常,非常重要。你用的是 I, us vs them,還是 "we" and "our"?
如果以後你在情緒高漲的時刻寫文,也不妨寄給英文好而且中立的朋友,請他們評估文字所帶著的情緒,會很有幫助。
★★★★★★★★★★★★
📌 前一陣子,Basecamp 事件震驚美國科技/新創圈。
Basecamp 是一家團隊協作軟體公司,創辦人 Jason Fried 跟 David Heinemeier Hansson 一直都很願意為自己的理想及理念說話。他們寫的 Rework 一書影響了非常多的人,我在台灣認識的好幾位創業家都曾經跟我分享這本書。
但他們四月底在部落格上公告 Basecamp 一系列政策改變之後,引來非常大的反彈。
我第一時間就有去他們的部落格看他們寫的文章,覺得文筆非常好,而且是用說道理的語氣,很 reasonable。但發布不久,公司超過30%的員工,決定離職,其中包括好幾位高階主管!
What happened? 那篇文章,很顯然觸發了一個危機。我回去再把文章看了一次,發現天啊... 那篇文章的語氣,根本沒有我第一次看感覺的溫和。
Changes at Basecamp: https://bit.ly/2SNN6Kr
很多魔鬼都藏在細節裡。
★★★★★★★★★★★★
📌 主要的改變 = 工作時別討論政治或社會議題
讓大家最氣憤的政策改變,其實就只有一個:
No more societal and political discussions on our company Basecamp account.
在這個時空背景下,美國社會立場分歧這麼深,從左右派政治議題,到種族歧視問題,Basecamp 領導人大膽決定,禁止員工在公司內部的線上溝通頻道,討論社會及政治議題。
要去弄社會政治議題,可以,但請別在公司內。
★★★★★★★★★★★★
📌 開頭還算溫和:說服大家把公司當產品看待
一開頭,Fried 就寫:
At Basecamp, we treat our company as a product. It's not a rigid thing that exists, it's a flexible, malleable idea that evolves. We aren't stuck with what we have, we can create what we want. Just as we improve products through iteration, we iterate on our company too.
Hmmm,為什麼要這樣開頭?為什麼要把「公司」跟「產品」劃上等號?
我們可以想像,Fried 肯定為了這篇文煩惱了一陣子。很多想法不斷的在他腦中盤旋,不同的開場,不同的句子...
但這個開頭,是一個很不錯的 framing:因為 Basecamp 的員工肯定很多 product fanatics - 就是最在乎產品好不好的 "builders"。Product lovers 的一個共同點,就是了解產品是會不斷改變的東西。如果說公司也是,就可以理解,公司也會改變。
然後,他非常小心的挑選最正面的說法。每一字每一句都是 product lovers 會認同的:
•flexible
•malleable
•evolve
•we can create what we want
•improve products
•iterate
用了一連串正面的同義字,就是要塑造 change = positive 的氣氛。
★★★★★★★★★★★★
📌 連大改變,都用「改版」來形容
下一步,就是用一個大家理解的方式,來描述「非常大的改變」:
Recently, we've made some internal company changes, which, taken in total, collectively feel like a full version change. It deserves an announcement.
什麼是大的改變?就有點像「改版」的意思。而且注意到,他不是寫 "We're making a full version change" 喔,而是說:"changes... taken in total, collectively feel like a full version change."
也就是說,在中間加了很多緩衝的字眼,淡化 "full version change"。
就像你如果要跟一個人說他是混蛋,哪一種說法比較直接:
The way you act sometimes, when people don't know you yet, can feel like you're a bit of an asshole. 或是 You're an asshole.
講完這個,他就要給大家打預防針了。
而且又是從「產品」開始:
In the product world, not all changes are enjoyed by all customers. Some changes are immediately appreciated. Some changes take time to steep, settle in, and get acquainted with. And to some, some changes never feel quite right — they may even be deal breakers.
哇噻,好幾劑預防針啊!
而且他用了三個意思差不多的字,鼓勵大家「耐心的習慣新的改變」:Some changes take time to steep, settle in, and get acquainted with。
Again 他的用字很細心。"Get acquainted with" 就好像跟我們說,
改變其實是我們的朋友,只要我們願意好好認識它。
但他們其實知道,有些改變是一些人完全,完全無法接受的。
所以才有最後一句:"They may even be deal breakers"。
They totally knew what was coming...
★★★★★★★★★★★★
📌 溫和就到這裡... 語氣開始轉變
接下來,他選擇美國人非常愛用的寫法,就是引用一位大家尊敬的人的話,來幫自己助陣:
As Huxley offers in The Doors of Perception, "We live together, we act on, and react to, one another; but always and in all circumstances we are by ourselves. The martyrs go hand in hand into the arena; they are crucified alone. Embraced, the lovers desperately try to fuse their insulated ecstasies into a single self-transcendence; in vain. By its very nature every embodied spirit is doomed to suffer and enjoy in solitude."
這裡藏了點玄機。
如果他的目的是說服大家接受這些改變,那為什麼要引用這一段!?
讀起來,這段話反應了他的心情:在做困難決定時的「孤獨」。如果是這樣,那這段話的用途就是「療癒」而不是「說服」。
因為如果目的是說服,為何不引用某個你的員工/讀者都非常敬佩的人的故事,這個人做了一個不受歡迎,但大部分讀者都會認同是正確的決定?
個人猜測:他上面好話已經寫完了。真正的意涵是:We're going forward, alone if necessary。
而且,他們還把自己的決定,frame 成 navigating somewhere,同時把另一邊寫成 circling nowhere
We all want different somethings. Some slightly different, some substantially. Companies, however, must settle the collective difference, pick a point, and navigate towards somewhere, lest they get stuck circling nowhere.
★★★★★★★★★★★★
📌 語氣變的很硬:No More
然後他就開始寫改革本身。
如果把所有改變的第一句話看過去,會發現全部都是 "No more..." 開頭。這個硬到不行了。
完整文章: https://bit.ly/3wT6x3z
圖片出處: https://bit.ly/34wWkO5
★★★★★★★★★★★★
Presentality每天都在追蹤與分析跟英文溝通/寫作有關的文章,如果想要透過我們這些「閱讀筆記」一起學習,可在 FB 追蹤我們:https://www.facebook.com/presentality/
📌 Presentality系列文章:
1. 看貝佐斯致亞馬遜股東的最後一封信,學一些英文寫作小撇步
https://bit.ly/3xCN1cC
2. 英文演講實用的結構與技巧
https://bit.ly/2PHu3Ax
3. 在演講中的四種敘述角度
https://bit.ly/39tNUtv
4. 詩人Amanda Gorman的英文演講技巧
https://bit.ly/39sI3on
5. 從 Most Dangerous Place 文章,看經濟學人寫作邏輯
https://bit.ly/3htqJEs
6. 寫作的終極目標是「提供價值」
https://bit.ly/3yA3gYe
7. 看 Bloomberg學資深記者如何寫文章
https://bit.ly/3i3am1P
同時也有10000部Youtube影片,追蹤數超過2,910的網紅コバにゃんチャンネル,也在其Youtube影片中提到,...
difference同義字 在 Eric's English Lounge Facebook 的最佳解答
[詞彙區別] people, individual, persons, human, man, mankind, humankind 的區別:
在寫作的時候,有些同學為了避免重複使用相同的詞彙,卻選用了意義上不盡相同的單字,而無法精確地表達出自己所想傳達的想法。這問題很可能來自於考生平時在語言學習上過於依賴中英翻譯,因此考生在不夠了解某些一字多義的詞彙的情況下,很容易造成讀者的誤解。舉例來說,spend vs. cost vs. take (花費),borrow vs. lend vs. loan (借),這些字的中譯都很非常類似,以中文為母語的考生在使用上,只要稍微一不注意,就容易錯誤使用。甚至有些考生會以offspring (子孫; 後代) 來代替 children (小孩),我們若是查字典了解其義,就會知道 offspring 比較常出現在正式的科學用法上,泛指動物的後代及植物的幼苗。
為了幫助同學增加詞彙量並且精確地在口說和寫作上使用這些字。我會用使用一個新的同義字系列清楚地區分這些類似的字並幫助同學們在文章中正確地使用它們。同學們也應該在使用這些字之前先查查字典,以了解這些字的使用方式。
People 的同義字
★★★human (human being) ★★★
我們使用human being這個字來強調我們和動物的不同。 We used human being to stress our difference from animals or aliens (in science fiction).
1. Dogs can hear much better than humans.
2. That is no way to treat another human being.
★★★man★★★
我們用man這個字來指男性、全部的人類、或指特定某一時代的人類。 We used man to talk about adult male human or humans as a group (or humans from a particular period of history).
1. The relationships between men and women are often complex and puzzling.
2. This is one of the worst diseases known to man.
3. Man had caused considerable damage to the environment.
4. Being a modern man today is no different than it was a century ago. It’s all about adhering to principle.
★★★mankind★★★
我們用mankind這個字來強調全部人類這個概念。 We used mankind when we talk about all humans as one large group.
1. Pollution is something that harms mankind across the globe, and disasters like war and famine have affected mankind all through our history.
*Man和mankind傳統上一直是用來指所有的男性和女性。很多人現在偏好使用humanity這個字和humankind來避掉性別歧視的問題。
Man and mankind have traditionally been used to mean “all men and women.” Many people now prefer to use humanity, the human race, human beings or people to avoid being sexist. Humankind is used as a gender neutral alternative to “mankind.”
★★★person★★★
person這個字是指人的單數。A person in the singular to refer to any human being.
1. He was a very nice person, always pleasant and friendly.
Persons 是 person的複數,是一個在文件或法律條文中使用的單字。
Persons (plural) is a very formal word. We only use it in rather legalistic contexts:
1. Any person or persons found in possession of illegal substances will be prosecuted.
2. The police are looking for three separate persons who were in this area.
People 也是person的複數,可指所有的人類或特定狀況中的一群人。它也可以指所有的國民。
People can refer to all human beings, or to a group of persons in a particular situation. It can also mean "all the citizens," as in a political leader who understands the needs of the people.
1. There were at least a thousand people in the audience.
2. The people are tired of hearing political rhetoric! They want action, not talk.
★★★individual★★★
我們用individual來強調個人以和團體做區隔。We used individual to stress that a person considered separately rather than as part of a group.
1. Every individual has rights which must never be taken away.
2. Three separate individuals walked into my store.
除了以上的用法,同學也可以用代名詞 (e.g. everyone, they) 來替換”人們” 這個單字,也可以用形容詞來更明確的指出某一群人(e.g. most, some, a few, all)。
Summary:
✎ 通常會用"people"這個詞彙來指稱一般的社會大眾;另一方面,如果想要去強調一個團體當中的每個人,則會使用"individuals"。
✎ 想要將所有人類當成一個大族群去做論述的時候,通常只會用"mankind/humankind"或是"the human race/human beings"等詞彙。
✎ 想要去強調一個人的人性面時,通常會用"human being"。
E.g. How could you do this to another human being? He has rights!
✎撰寫科學性質的相關文章時,才會運用到"Homo sapiens"。
https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=443676912389120
Sources:
http://www.oxfordlearnersdictionaries.com/
http://www.ldoceonline.com/
http://www.merriam-webster.com/
http://www.vocabulary.com/