最好的自己不在未來，就在現在。
認真回想，以前我好像在每一段關係中都是在扮演某一個角色，不由自主的在為每個對象做調整。不只有在戀愛上，有時候可能跟朋友、工作夥伴都是，尤其是在前輩面前，常常我都會本能反應似的改變自己。聲音要甜一點嗎？笑話要低級一點嗎？從穿衣服就可以看出，我今天是要跟誰吃飯。雖然是微調，但透露出了一件事，我好像不夠喜歡真正的自己，所以才會擔心大家也不會喜歡真正的我。我告訴自己即使累，但如果持續努力，有一天就能變成大家都喜歡的Lara。
久而久之我和世界的相處模式只有「由外到內」，會依照別人對我的反應去斷定我的下一步。大家會覺得我很好相處，我卻越來越不快樂。現在我慢慢開始懂了，原來我把順序弄反了。我該優先處理的是自己內心的感受，其他人買不買單，其實跟你一點關係都沒有。就像找另外一半，如果我跟夢中情人在一起，但我根本無法在他面前做自己，最後還是會走不下去。
我現在33歲，So What? 終於懂，「當下的自己」才是人生時間軸上最重要的！
對了，有人好奇這次「{}」的意思嗎？簡單說是「大括號」，在數學運算式中稱作「空集合」。數學不好的人就想像一個清空的行李箱吧。「空」不是無，而是無限可能。括號還有另外一個更好懂的意思，就是「優先處理」。將過去整理過後的自己，回歸純粹，態度成熟自信！(失戀後重新出發的人應該很有感觸吧！🤣)
Your best self is not in the future, but in the Now.
Looking back, I seem to have been playing a role in almost every relationship I was ever in. I'm not just talking about romantic relationships. Whether it was with friends or colleagues (especially seniors), I would modify myself almost instinctively. Should my voice be sweeter? My jokes dirtier? If you wanted to know who I was eating with that day, all you had to do was look at the clothes I was wearing.
The changes were subtle, but they still reflected a truth: I didn’t feel like the real me was enough so I was worried that other people would also find her lacking. I told myself that if I just kept working at it, I would someday become a version of Lara that everyone accepted.
Eventually I only knew how to get my cues from the external world. I would always base my next step on feedback I got from others. Most people considered me easy to get along with, but I grew more and more unhappy.
I think I had it all wrong. My first priority should have been listening to my inner voice. Whether or not other people agree with it is not in my control nor of my concern. Take looking for a partner. Even if I found the person of my dreams, it would never last if I couldn’t be myself around them.
I am 33 years old. So What? I finally understand that "the present self" is the most important thing on the timeline of life! It’s time to prioritize me!
By the way, is anyone curious about the meaning of "{}" this time? Besides the more commonly known representation of parentheses as prioritization, these curly brackets are called “the empty set”. The empty what? If like me, math is not your strongest suit, think of it as an empty suitcase. "Empty" doesn’t mean nothing, but infinite possibilities! What will you fill your life with this time?
2021全新專輯《來者何人{}》
數位收聽：https://LaraLiang.lnk.to/DearYou2
<再也沒有你> 陳勢安 Andrew Tan
數位收聽：https://kkbox.fm/Iss26l
#Lara梁心頤2021全新專輯二部曲 #來者何人{} 全球發行
#再也沒有你 #NoMoreU #SoWhat30
be myself意思 在 [外絮] 龜龜：如果以後再有人叫我Westbrick，我- 看板NBA 的必吃
龜龜：如果以後再有人叫我Westbrick，我會出來制止
“I think, for one, 100% stand behind my wife and how she’s feeling because it
’s not about just this year. Right now, she’s reached a point and my family ha
s reached a point where it’s really weighing on them and its very unfortunate j
ust for me personally because this is just a game. This not end all be all. When
it comes to basketball, I don’t mind the criticism of missing and making shot.
But the moment it becomes where my name is getting shamed, it becomes an issue.
I’ve kind of let it go in the past because it never really bothered me."
龜龜：首先我想，你們都知道我100%支持我的妻子以及她的感受，因為這不僅僅是發生在今
年賽季。現在，她已經到了一個臨界點，我的家人已經到了一個真正讓他們感到壓力的臨界
點，這對我個人來說非常不幸，因為這只是場籃球比賽。這還不是生活的全部。談到籃球比
賽，我並不介意對我投籃選擇或者出手沒能命中的批評，但當有人藉此想侮辱我的名字，那
就成了一個問題。過去我總是想著隨它去吧，因為它從不曾讓我心煩。
"It really hit me the other day. Me and wife were at the teacher-parent conferen
ce for my son. And the teacher told me, Noah is so proud of his last name, he wr
ites it everywhere, he tells everyone ‘I’m Westbrook’… I kind of sat there i
n shock and it hit me. I can’t no longer allow people, for example, Westbrick t
o me is now shaming, shaming my name and my legacy for my kid. It’s a name that
means more to me, my wife, my mom, my dad, the ones that paved the way for me."
龜龜：前幾天這件事真的觸動到我，我和妻子參加了我兒子的家長會。老師告訴我，Noah為
自己的姓氏感到非常自豪，他會在任何地方，任何東西上寫上自己的姓氏，他告訴大家我姓
Westbrook……我有點震驚地坐在那裡，這觸動到了我。我不能再允許別人，例如用Westbri
ck來侮辱我的姓氏。我的姓氏是我留給我孩子的遺產，不僅是對我，對我的妻子，我的父母
和那些為我開闢道路的人們來說，都有更為深刻的意義。
"That’s just one example myself and my wife where its not great and I think a l
ot of times, I let it slide, but now its time to put a stop to that, and put it
on notice, there’s a difference. Every time I hear it now, I will make sure I a
ddress it and nip that in the bud… It’s very unfortunate, it’s been like this
for my entire career. I’ve been blessed and super thankful for the ones around
me and the ones that support me but it’s really the shaming of my name, the sh
aming of my character, the shaming of who am I as a person, is to me, not warran
te. I haven’t done anything to anyone, I haven’t hurt anyone. I’ve done noth
ing but play basketball a way that people may not like. And this is just a game.
This not my entire life. I think that is the ultimate thing that’s been for me
…"
龜龜：這只是影響我和我妻子的一個例子，這是不對的，我想過很多次，我過去都一笑而過
，但現在是時候制止這種行為，並且引起人們的注意，我的籃球生涯和生活是不同的。現在
我每次參加記者會都會強調這一點，我會確保我解決它並將它扼殺在萌芽狀態......很不幸
的是，這種聲音充斥著我的整個職業生涯，我很感激我周圍的人和支持我的人，但是對我人
格上的侮辱，對我姓氏的侮辱，對我性格上的侮辱，我認為沒有必要。我沒有對任何人做任
何事，我沒有傷害任何人。除了我打球的風格人們可能不喜歡之外，我什麼也沒做。這只是
場籃球比賽，這不是我全部的生活，而我認為生活對我來說是最重要的事情……
https://reurl.cc/MbggAn
感觸良多
--
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