關於 quiet breathing ，我們在網路上蒐集到這些相關的討論、資訊與評價

PRODUCTS REVIEW - JO MALONE LONDON

1. COLOGNE COLLECTION SET 5x9ml

💡DETAILS: [JO MALONE Cologne Collection 5x9ml] With five bestsellers from Jo Malone, spoiling yourself with different delicate fragrances, including floral, woody and citrus ones, is the key of becoming unique and chic. The set contains: [Peony & Blush Suede Cologne (9ml)] This is a cologne of elegance and sexiness, carrying the floral notes with rose, jasmine and peony, layered with the trails of sweet apple and suede, making you as tempting as a ripen apple. {Product Features} Mainly composed with floral notes, with a hint of sweetness from the red apple, as flirtatious as a tempting rose. Suitable for those who are feminine, sexy and elegant. The fragrance is selected by Jo Malone and bottled with its classic design. [Lime Basil & Mandarin Cologne (9ml)] This cologne blends Mandarin and Lime to bring a refreshing top notes. The herbaceous warmth of basil, with a peppery edge, adds an unexpected twist to the vibrant citrus notes. A woody note with an amber-like scent that brings addictive warmth to the fragrance. {Product Features} Mainly composed with citrus notes, this signature fragrance features the refreshing feeling of Caribbean breeze. Suitable for those who advocate freedom, active and gentle. The fragrance is selected by Jo Malone and bottled with its classic design. [English Pear & Freesia Cologne (9ml)] This cologne contains white freesias, and mellowed by amber, patchouli and woods. It captures the luscious scent of just-ripe pears, cooled by the autumn air and ready to twist free from the tree. {Product Features} English Pear & Freesia Cologne is the essence of autumn. The fragrance of English pear and freesia connected with souls of the British. Suitable for those who are quiet, low-profile and gentle. The fragrance is selected by Jo Malone and bottled with its classic design. [Wild Bluebell Cologne (9ml)] The delicate sweetness of dewy bluebells showered with the sparkling succulence of persimmon and lemon. It makes you to feel like immersing in a mesmerizing sea of wild flowers misted with dew. {Product Features} The sweetness of dewy bluebells sparkling the sweetness and freshness which is so mesmerizing. Suitable for those who are elegant and gentle. The fragrance is selected by Jo Malone and bottled with its classic design. [Wood Sage & Sea Salt Cologne (9ml)] This cologne inspired by the salt air, sea grasses and rocky cliffs of coast. It blends the mineral scent of the rugged cliffs and the woody earthiness of sage. Let you enjoy the scent of breathing sea salt and the earth. {Product Features} The woody fragrance makes you feel like escape the everyday along the windswept shore. Suitable for those who are quiet, mature and gentle. The fragrance is selected by Jo Malone and bottled with its classic design.

✅RATING: 10/10
🔴MY REVIEW: I really liked this set. There are such a great way to smell the different fragrances. Well, Jo Malone has become my favorite fragrance. All of the scents were really nice. It is difficult to choose which perfume is the best, because each one has a unique smell. This size of 9ml is definitely suitable for travel and to carry in purse for whenever. English Pear & Freesia Cologne, it’s one of my favorite fragrances, this’s an intoxicating scent reminding me of summers in England countryside (Ribble Valley, Lancashire). It lasts all day and smells wonderful. Another scent I want to mention is Lime Basil & Mandarin Cologne. I have been wearing it as my daily cologne for about two weeks. It’s a light citrus that is pleasant but not obstrusive. A great daytime fragrance. Love it. Definitely recommend this COLOGNE COLLECTION SET.

2. WILD BLUEBELL COLOGNE 30ml

💡DETAILS: Product details have been mentioned in #1

✅RATING: 10/10
🔴MY REVIEW: Smells wonderful. I always get so many compliments when I wear this cologne and it’s not overpowering. It’s light and airy with a pleasant scent. Love this brand colognes. They are subtle yet long lasting. Definitely recommend.

3. WOOD SAGE & SEA SALT COLOGNE 30ml

💡DETAILS: Product details have been mentioned in #1

✅RATING: 10/10
🔴MY REVIEW: The layers of scent are very summery, fresh and clean. This’s my new favorite scent. I can say with complete certainty, Jo Malone is a classy brand. It lasts all day, without being offensive in the late afternoon. Highly recommend.

📌Disclaimer: The above review is purely personal opinion. Not everyone likes what I like. Please note that what may work for me, may not work for anyone else. Results may vary from person to person, so please take this into consideration if you decide to try those products.

🔎OFFICIAL WEBSITE - https://www.jomalone.co.uk
🔎FACEBOOK - https://m.facebook.com/JoMaloneLondon/
🔎IG - @jomalonelondon

#jomalone #jomalonehk #jomalonelondon #wildbluebell #woodsageandseasalt #cologne #colognecollection #lovekakalovescents #lovekakalovebeauty #hkbeauty #beautyblogger #kakablogs #kakalovekakalovelife #productreview #shoponline

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信任的幸福

Translation: @benkongenglish
.
同一個標題有在《藍色》書中出現過
再一次使用一樣的標題
因為再一次 我感受到信任的幸福
.
這隻狗狗忙碌地在客桌間巡視
短小而緊湊的步伐
讓他看起來精神奕奕 驕傲得意
像店經理積極地詢問客人消費滿意度
看到他的客人心底多少有分敬意
也忍不住被嬌小的身體 可愛的服裝吸引
摸一把頭上鬆軟的毛 抓一下捲曲的尾巴
然後店經理扭著屁股 驕傲地前往下一桌
.
我是熱情的人
但不是有禮貌的客人
看到店經理討喜的模樣
一把抱起牠 摟在我胸前
我好難用文字告訴你 好難好難
那一刻的幸福有多扎實多深 好真好真
從未相識的兩個靈魂對彼此完全信任
我信任牠不會傷害我
所以靠得很近
牠信任我不會傷害牠
所以原本緊湊的步伐在我的胸前靜止
所以原本急促的呼吸在我的眼下和緩
我不知道該跟你說什麼
但謝謝這一分鐘的幸福暖愛
我們都好安靜好安靜
.
不知道是什麼終結了這一分鐘
我輕輕放下 牠扭著屁股 前往下一桌
.
那時與朋友在餐廳見面 送書給他
《你的藍色不是我的藍色》像這篇文一樣真心
送書給朋友時在書頁留的話 像這篇文一樣真心
我與人交談互動時 像這篇文一樣真心
這篇文和下筆回憶時擒住的淚一樣真心
因為我希望用真心換得信任以及幸福
無奈社會不單純 人性不簡單
我們心裡想的和別人想的不一定相容
熱情可能被視為面具
真心可能被視為笑話
信任可能被視為傻子
文章可能被視為幌子
.
我願意作戴面具的傻子被笑話是個幌子
遍體鱗傷也值得
只為更崇高的幸福理想
經歷許多尖銳 第一千次總該是幸福了吧
至少能不錯過吧 能嗎？
.
This is one of the titles in my book
It is used again because once again I feel the contentment of trust
.
This proud and energy-radiant doggy was busy patrolling over tables with its small but frequent steps like a manager surveying the satisfaction of customers, while customers were inevitably drawn by its cuteness and tiny body.
It went on to the next table after the fluffy fur on its head was touched and the curly tail was grabbed.
.
I am passionate but not a customer particularly pay attention to courtesy
Charmed by the little manager, I scooped it up and held it in front of my chest
The bond we had at that moment was indescribable
It was the total trust between two souls that had never met before
We allowed each other to be close to each other because we trusted we would do each other no harm
It stopped its strides and slowed its breathing under my watch
I didn’t know what to say to you but thank you for the complete contentment
We were quiet...absolute quiet
.
The moment ended eventually
I put it down gently.
The manager shook its ass and continued towards the next table
.
I was here meeting my friend in a restaurant and gave him my book, which was as true as this piece of writing, so as the words I left in the books for my friend.
I hold the same honesty when I communicate with others and even the tears almost poured down when I was digging into my memories writing this piece
I hope honesty can get trust and contentment in return
However the society is not pure and people’s nature is complicated.
Passion may be seen as a mask
Honesty may be seen as a joke
Trusting may be seen as a fool
Writings may be seen as a lie
.
I am willing to be seen as the fool wearing a mask being joked as a liar
Even if it may gives me endless wounds
All these are for higher ideology
Having experienced all these thorns, it should be something good as the 1000th time looms
At least I won’t miss it, will I?

My sister, Michelle-Ann Iking's 3% chance of conceiving naturally was a success! Here's her story:

(My apologies as I've been overwhelmed with personal matters. I've only managed to get to my desk. So finally got around posting this).

This is the story behind my sister's pregnancy struggle and how she shared her journey over her Facebook page.

Because some may have not caught her LIVE session chat with me (https://www.facebook.com/daphneiking/videos/687743128744960/) , or read her lengthy post (as it's a private page);
she's allowed me to copy and paste it over my wall, in case you need to know more about her thought process on how AND why she focused on the 3% success probability. Read on.

-------------------------------------------

Posted 10th May 2020.
FB Credit: Michelle-Ann Iking

A week ago today I celebrated becoming a mother to our second, long awaited child.

Please forgive this mother's LONG (self-indulgent) post, journalling what this significant milestone has meant for her personally, for her own fallible memory's sake as well as maybe to share one day with her son.

If all you were wondering was whether I had delivered and if mum and bub are OK, please be assured the whole KkLM family are thriving tremendously, and continue scrolling right along your Newsfeed 😁.

OUR 3% MIRACLE

All babies are miracles... and none more so than our precious Kiaen Aaryan (pronounced KEY-n AR-yen), whose name derives from Sanskrit origins meaning:

Grace of God
Spiritual
Kind
Benevolent

...words espousing the gratitude Kishore and I feel for Kiaen's arrival as our "3% miracle".

He was conceived, naturally, after 3 years of Kishore and I hoping, praying and 'endeavoring'... and only couples for whom the objective switches from pure recreation to (elusive) procreation will understand how this is less fun than it sounds ...

3 years during which time we had consensus from 3 different doctors that we, particularly I (with my advancing age etc etc) had only a 3% chance of natural conception and that our best hope for a sibling for our firstborn, Lara Anoushka, was via IVF.

Lara herself was an 'intervention baby', being one of the 20% of babies successfully conceived through the less intrusive IUI process, after a year and a half of trying naturally and already being told then my age was a debilitating factor.

We had tried another round of IUI for her sibling in 2017 when Lara was a year old. And that time we fell into the ranks of the 80% of would-be parents for whom it would be an exercise in futility... who would go home, comfort each other as best they could, while individually masking their own personal disappointment... hoping for the best, 'the next time around'...

So the improbability ratio of 97% against natural conception of our second baby, as concurred by the combined opinion of 3 medical professionals, was a very real, very daunting figure for us to have to mentally deal with.

Deep, DEEP, down in my heart however, though I had many a day of doubt... I kept a core kernel of faith that somehow, I would again experience the privilege of pregnancy, and again, have a chance at childbirth.

And so, the optimist in me would tell myself, "Well, there have to be people who fall in the 3% bucket... why shouldn't WE be part of the 3%?"

Those who know me well, understand my belief in the Law of Attraction, the philosophy of focusing your mind only on what you want to attract, not on what you don't want, and so even as Kishore and I prepared to go into significant personal debt to attempt IVF in the 2nd half of 2019, I marshalled a last ditch effort to hone in on that 3% chance of natural conception... through research coming across fertility supplements that I ordered from the US and sent to a friend in Singapore to redirect to me because the supplier would not deliver to Malaysia.

I made us as a couple take the supplements in the 3 month 'priming period' in the lead up to the IVF procedure - preconditioning our bodies for optimum results, if you will.

At the same time, I had invested in a sophisticated fertility monitor, with probes and digital sensors for daily tracking of saliva and other unmentionable fluid samples, designed to pinpoint with chemical accuracy my state of fertility on any given day.

(UPDATE: For those interested - I obtained the supplements and Ovacue Fertility Monitor from https://www.fairhavenhealth.com/. Though I had my supplies delivered to a friend in Singapore, and redirected to me here since the US site does not deliver to Malaysia, there are local distributors for these products, you will just have to research the trustworthiness of the vendors yourself...)

I had set an intention - in the 3 months of pre-IVF priming, I would consume what seemed like a pharmacy's worth of supplements, and track fertility religiously... in hopes that somehow, within the 3 month priming period, we would conceive naturally and potentially save ourselves a down payment on a new property... and this was just a projection on financial costs of IVF, not even considering the physical, emotional and mental toll it involves, with no guarantee of a baby at the end of it all...

It was a continuation of an intention embedded even with my first pregnancy, where all the big ticket baby items were consciously purchased for use by a future sibling, in gender neutral colours, in hopes that sibling would be a brother "for a balanced pair", though of course any healthy child would be a welcome blessing.

It was a very conscious determination to always skew my thoughts in service of what the end objective was. For example, when 3+year old Lara would innocently express impatience at not yet having a sibling, at one point suggesting that since we were "taking too long to give her a baby brother/sister", perhaps we should just "go buy a baby from a shop", instead of getting defensive or berating the baby that she herself was, we enlisted Lara's help to pray for her sibling... so in any place of worship, or sacred ground of any kind that we passed thereon, Lara would stop, close her eyes, bow her small head and place her tiny hands together in prayer, reciting earnestly, "Please God, please give me a baby brother or baby sister."

After months and months of watching Lara do this, in the constancy of her childlike chant, Kishore started feeling the pressure of possibly disappointing Lara if her prayer was not answered. Whereas for me, Lara's recitation of her simple wish became like a strengthening mantra, our collective intention imbued with greater power with each repetition, and the goal of a sibling kept very much in the forefront of our minds (hence our calling Lara our 'project manager' in this endeavour).

And somehow in the 2nd month of that 3 month period, a positive + sign appeared on one of the home pregnancy tests I had grown accustomed to taking - my version of the lottery tickets others keep buying in hopes of hitting the jackpot, with all the cyclical anticipation and more often than not, disappointment, that entails...

This time however I was not disappointed.

With God's Grace, (hence 'Kiaen', a variation of 'Kiaan' which means 'Grace of God'), my focus on our joining the ranks of the 3% had materialised.

It seems poetic then, that Kiaen chose to make his appearance on the 3rd May, ironically the same date that his paternal great-grandfather departed this world for the next... such that in the combined words of Kishore and his father Kai Vello Suppiah,

"The 1st generation Suppiah left on 3rd May and the 4th generation Suppiah arrived on 3rd May after 41yrs...
One leaves, another comes, the legacy lives on..."

***

KIAEN AARYAN SUPPIAH'S BIRTH STORY

On Sunday 3rd May, I was 40 weeks and 5 days pregnant.

The baby was, in my mind, very UN-fashionably late past his due date of 29th April, so as much as I had willed and 'manifested' the privilege of pregnancy, to say I was keen to be done with it all was an understatement.

In the weeks leading to up to my full term, I had experienced increasingly intense Braxton-Hicks 'practice contractions' - annoying for me for the discomfort involved, stressful for Kishore who was on tenterhooks with the false alarms, on constant alert for when we would actually need to leave home for the hospital.

Having become a Hypnobirthing student and advocate from my first pregnancy with Lara, and thus being equipped with
(1) a lack of fear about childbirth in general and
(2) a basic understanding of how all the sensations I would experience fit into the big picture of my body bringing our baby closer to us,
I was less stressed - content to wait for the baby to be "fully cooked" and come out whenever he was ready... though I wouldn't have minded at all if the cooking time ended sooner, rather than later.

With Lara, I had been somewhat 'forced' into an induced labour, even though she was not yet due, and that had resulted in a 5 DAY LABOUR, a Birth Story for another post, so I was not inclined to chemically induce labour, even though I was assured that for second time mothers, it would be 'much faster and easier'...

That morning, I had a hunch *maybe* that day was the day, because in contrast to previous weeks' sensations of tightening, pressure and even spasms that were concentrated in the front of my abdomen and occasionally shot through my sides and legs, I felt period - like cramping in my lower back which I had not felt before throughout the pregnancy.

It was about 8am in the morning then, and my 'surges' were still relatively mild ('surges' being Hypnobirthing - speak for 'contractions', designed to frame them with the more positive connotations needed to counteract common language in which childbirth is presented as something that is unequivocally painful and traumatic, instead of the miraculous, powerful and natural phenomenon it actually is).

I recall (masochistically?) entertaining the thought of opting NOT to have an epidural JUST TO SEE WHAT IT WOULD BE LIKE...

I figured this would be the last time I would be pregnant and so it would be my 'last chance' to experience 'drug free labour' which, apart from the health benefits for baby and mother, might be *interesting* in a way that people who are curious about what getting a tattoo and skydiving and bungee jumping are like, might find these *interesting*...even knowing there will be pain and risk involved...

Since I have tried tattoos and skydiving (unfortunately not being able to squeeze in bungee-jumping while my life was purely my own to risk at no dependents' possible detriment) a similar curiousity about a no-epidural labour was on my mind...

In the absence of other signs of the onset of labour (like 'bloody show' or my waters breaking), I wanted to wait until the surges were coming every few minutes before we actually left the house for the hospital, not wanting to be one of those couples who rushed in too early and had interminable waits for the next stage in unfamiliar, clinical surroundings and/or were made to go home in an anti-climatic manner.

I was even calm enough through my surges to have the presence of mind to wash and blowdry my hair, knowing if I did deliver soon I would not be allowed this luxury for a while.

Around 9am I asked Kishore to prep for Lara and himself to be dressed and breakfasted so we could head to hospital soon, while I sent messages to family members on both sides informing them 'today might be the day.'

My mother, who had briefly served as a midwife before going back into general nursing and then becoming a nursing tutor, prophetically stated that if what I was experiencing was true labour, "the baby would be out by noon".

The pace in which my surges grew closer together was surprisingly quicker than I expected; and while I asked Lara to "Hurry up with breakfast" with only a tad more urgency than we normally tell her to do, little Missy being prone to dilly-dallying at meals, I probably freaked Kishore out when about 930am onwards, I had to instinctively get on my hands and knees a couple of times, eyes closed, trying to practice the Hypnobirthing breathing techniques I had revised to help along the process of my body birthing our child into the world.

I recall him saying a bit frantically as I knelt at our front door, doubled over as he waited for Lara to complete something or other, "Lara hurry up! Can't you see Mama is in so much pain and you are taking your own sweet time??!!"

SIDETRACK: Just the night before, Lara and I had watched a TV show in which a woman gave birth with the usual histrionics accompanying pop culture depictions of labour.

Lara watched the scene, transfixed.

I told her, simply and matter-of-factly, "That's what Mama has to do to get baby brother out Lara, and that's what I had to do for you also."

In most of interactions with my daughter, I have sought to equip her to face life's situations with calmness, truthful common sense, and ideally a minimum of drama.

Those who know the dramatic diva that Lara can be will know that this is a work-in-progress, but her response to me that night showed me some of my 'teachings' were sinking in:

She looked at me unfazed, "But Mama," she said. "You won't cry and scream like that lady, right? You will be BRAVE and stay calm, right?"
#nopressure.

So as we prepped to leave for the hospital I did indeed attempt to be that role model of calm for her, asking her only for her help in keeping very quiet,
"Because Mama needs to focus on bringing baby brother out and she needs quiet to concentrate...".

As we left the house at 10.11am, I texted Kishore's sister Geetha to please prep to pick up Lara from the hospital, and was grateful Kishore had the foresight to ask our gynae to prepare a letter for Geetha to show any police roadblocks between my in-laws' home in Subang Jaya and the hospital in Bangsar, this all happening under the Movement Control Order (MCO).

To Lara's credit, in the journey over to the hospital, she - probably sensing the gravity of the situation, sat very quietly in her seat at the back, and the silence was punctuated only by my occasional deep intakes of breath and some variation of my Ohmmm-like moans when the sensations were at their height.

By the time we got to Pantai Hospital at around 10.30am, my surges were strong enough I requested a wheelchair to assist me in getting to the labour ward, as I did not trust my own legs to support me... and Kishore would have to wait until Geetha had arrived to take Lara back to my in-laws' house before he himself could go up.

I slumped in the wheelchair and was wheeled up to the labour room with my eyes closed the whole time, trying to handle my surges.

I didn't even look up to see the attendant who pushed me... but did make the effort to thank him sincerely when he handed me over, with what seemed like a palpable sense of relief on his part, to the labour ward nurses.

The nurse attending me at Pantai was calm, steady and efficient. I answered some questions and changed into my labour gown while waiting for Kishore to come up, all the while managing the increasingly intense surges with my rusty Hypnobirthing breathing techniques.

By the time Kishore joined me at around 11am (I know these timings based on the timestamps of the 'WhatsApp live feed' of messages Kishore sent to his family), I was asking the nurse on duty, "How soon can I get an epidural??" thinking what crazy woman thought she could do this without drugs???!!!

The nurse checked my cervix dilation, I saw her bloodied glove indicating my mucous plug had dislodged, and she told me, "Well you are already at 7cm (which, for the uninitiated, is 70% of the way to the 10cm dilation needed for birthing), you are really doing well, if you made it this far without any drugs, if can you try and manage without it... I suspect within 2 hours or less you will deliver your baby and since it will take about that time for the anaesthesiologist to be called, epidural to be administered and kick in... it might all be for nothing... but of course the decision is completely up to you... "

So there I was, super torn, should I risk the sensations becoming worse... or risk the epidural becoming a waste?? And of course I was trying to decide this as my labour surges were coming at me stronger and stronger...

I was in such a dilemma...because as a 'recovering approval junkie' there was also a silly element of approval-seeking involved, ("The nurse thinks I can do this without drugs... maybe I CAN do this without drugs... Yay me!") mixed with that element of curiosity I mentioned earlier ("What if I actually CAN do this without drugs... plenty of other women have done it all over the world since time immemorial.. no big deal, how bad can it be...??") so then I thought I would use the financial aspect to be the 'tiebreaker' in my decision making...

I asked the nurse how much an epidural would cost and when she replied "Around MYR1.5k", I still remember Kishore's incredulous face as I asked the question, i.e."Seriously babe, you are gonna think about money right now? If you need the epidural TAKE IT, don't worry about the money!!!"... and while we are not rich by any stretch of the imagination, thankfully RM1.5k is not a quantum that made me swing towards a decision to "better save the money"...

So in the end, I guess my curiosity won out, and I turned down the epidural "just to see what it would be like and if I had it in me" (in addition of course to avoiding the side effects of any drugs introduced into my and the baby's body).

My labour occuring in the time of coronavirus, it was protocol for me to have a COVID19 test done, so the medical staff could apply the necessary precautions. I had heard from a friend Sharon Ruba that the test procedure was uncomfortable, so when the nurse came with the test kit as I was starting another surge, I asked, "Please can I just finish this surge before I do the test?" as I really didn't think I could multitask tackling multiple uncomfortable sensations in one go.

The COVID19 test involved what felt like a looong, skinny cotton bud being inserted into one nostril... I definitely felt more than a tickle as it went in and up, being told to take deep breaths by the nurse. Then she asked me to "Try to swallow" and I felt it go into my nasal cavities where I didn't think anything could go any further, but was proven wrong when she asked me to swallow again and the swab was probed even deeper. Then she warned me there would be some slight discomfort as she prepared to collect a sample... but at that point all I could think about was:

(i) I really don't have much of a choice
(ii) please let this be over before my next surge kicks in
(iii) if all the people breaking the MCO rules knew what it feels like to do this test maybe they won't put themselves at risk of the need to perform one...

In full disclosure as I was transferred into the actual delivery room at some point after 11am, another nurse offered me 'laughing gas' to ostensibly take some of the edge off... I took the self-operated breathing nozzle passed to me but don't recall it making any difference to my sensations..so didn't use it much as it seemed pretty pointless.

I recall some measure of relief when I heard my gynae Dr. Paul entering the room, greeting Kishore and me, and telling us it was going well and it wouldn't be long now and he would see us again shortly.

From my previous labour with Lara I knew the midwives pretty much take you 90% of the way through the labour and when the Dr is called in you are really at the home stretch, so was very relieved to hear his voice though knowing he would leave and come back later meant it wasn't quite over yet.

I do remember realising when I had crossed the Thinning and Opening Phase of labour to the Birthing Phase, by the change in sensations... it is still amazing to me that as the Hypnobirthing book mentioned, having this knowledge I was instinctively able to switch breathing techniques for the next stage of labour .

Was my opting against epidural the right choice for me?

Overall? Yes.

Don't get me wrong.

I *almost* regretted the decision several times during active labour... especially when I felt my body being taken over by an overwhelming compulsion to push that did not seem conscious and was accompanied by involuntary gutteral moans where I literally just thought to myself, "I surrender, God do with me what you will..." (super dramatic I know but VERY real at the time...).

I think I experienced 3-4 such natural explusive reflexes (?), rhythmically pushing the baby down the birth path, one of which was accompanied by what felt like a swoosh of water coming out of a hose with a diameter the size of a golf ball... this was when I realised my water had finally broken...

The nurses kept instructing me to do different things, to keep breathing, to move to my side, then to move to the middle, to raise my feet... and when I didn't comply, Kishore (who was with me throughout both my labours) tried to help them by repeating the instructions prefaced with "Sayang..." but I basically ignored all the intructions because I felt I had no capacity to direct any part of my body to do anything and someone else would have to physically manoeuvre that body part themselves.

When I heard Dr. Paul's voice again and the flurry of commotion surrounding his presence, I knew the time was close... and when I heard the nurse say to Kishore, "Sir, these are your gloves, for when you cut the baby's cord", it was music to my ears...

I'm very, VERY grateful Kiaen slid out after maybe the 4th of those involuntary pushes... the wave of RELIEF when he came out so quickly... it still boggles my mind that my mother was essentially right and as his birth time was 12.02pm, it was *only* about 1.5 hours between our arrival at the hospital and his arrival into the world.

Kiaen was placed on my chest for skin to skin bonding and remained there for a considerable time.

For our short stay in the hospital he would be with us in my maternity ward number C327... another trivially serendipitous sign for me because he was born on the 3rd (May) and our wedding anniversary is 27th (July).

I was discharged the following day 4th May at about 5.30pm, after I got an all clear on COVID19 and a paediatric surgeon did a small procedure on Kiaen to address a tongue-tie that would affect his breastfeeding latch... making the entire duration of our stay about 31 hours.

I have taken the time and effort to record all this down so that whenever life's challenges threaten to get me down I can remind myself, "Ignore the 97% failure probability, focus on the 3% success probability".

Also that the human condition is miraculous and it is such a privilege to experience it.

To our son Kiaen Aaryan, thank you for coming into our lives and choosing us as your parents.

Even though Papa and I are both zombies trying to settle into a night time feeding routine with you, I look forward to spending not only all future Mother's Days, but every day, with you and your Akka...

And last but not least, to my husband Kishore...without whom none of this would be possible - we did it sayang, I love you ❤️

Photo credit: Stayhome session with Samantha Yong Photography (http://samanthayong.com/)

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I know the way the story goes
我知道這劇本會怎麼走

The first part is the fun
一開始總看似美好

We leave the room a little cold
但如今只剩冷戰中的你我

To keep each other warm
只為讓彼此冷靜

Just for a minute
即使一分鐘也好

'Fore the bombs are hidden
在情緒爆發以前

And every night it turns to war
每晚都有無盡戰火

Thought we had a vision
以為彼此所見略同

Don't know what I see in us
但現在我完全看不出能再相愛的

No more
你我

Cause we're halfway broken
因為我們的心都快碎了

Try to make up
怎麼假裝

Damage already done
傷得全身到處都是啊

And it's only
最後只會

One way down
毫無解藥

Guess now I'll join the club
我想大家下場都一樣

Cause everyone falls so hard
因為大家都被傷得太重了啊

And everything falls apart
一切都逐漸崩解掉

But we know we
但你我都

Still got heart
還有心

Here's to the broken ones
即使已殘破不堪

Here's to the broken ones
還有顆殘破的心

Broken
殘破不堪

Here's to the broken ones
都徹底被傷透

I used to know your breathing sounds
我還記得你呼吸的聲響

You'd sound me off to sleep
總能讓我安穩入眠

Oh we're just lying quiet now
但現在我們都無聲地躺著

Both wide awake but
彼此都徹夜難眠

Dreaming of the minute
思緒想著從前

Fore the bombs were hidden
在爭執開始之前

And every night it turns to war
那時還未點燃戰火

Thought we had a vision
以為夢想能夠如願

Don't know what I see in us
但現在完全不懂彼此的關係

No more
不懂

Cause we're halfway broken
因為我們都支離破碎

Try to make up
嘗試彌補

Damage already done
但話語早讓彼此受傷

And it's only
內心早已

One way down
被破壞掉

Guess now I'll join the club
我想我們都一樣

Cause everyone falls so hard
因為大家都遍體鱗傷

And everything falls apart
一切都崩解毀壞掉

But we know we
但仍存留

Still got heart
一顆心

Here's to the broken ones
即使都支離破碎掉

(Broken)
殘破不堪

Here's to the broken ones
即使都已被傷透

Here's to the broken ones
都被徹底破壞掉

(Broken)
殘破不堪

Here's to the broken ones
即使都殘破不堪

Here's to the broken ones
都徹底被傷透

Here's to the broken ones
心都已殘破不堪

(Broken)
殘破不堪

Here's to the broken ones
心早已殘破不堪

作詞/作曲：Nicholas Miller / Annika Marie Wells

歌詞翻譯by Ray

#EkhoD #LeonC #我的秘密 #香港rap

Song & Lyrics: LeonC & Ekho-D
Mixing: GrandD
Prod: Opium Light- provided by Rujay

Follow:
LeonC :https://www.instagram.com/__cch.l/
Streetvoice: https://streetvoice.com/leonchang0910/songs/612256/

L:
你在我的心裡 無人可以代替
身在外地的你 從來沒有在意
我對你的熱情 根本沒有decrease
But you decide......oh no leave me

D:
你在我的心裡 無人可以代替
錯過了的時機 是你選擇放棄
愛情需要耐性 你說得太容易
You liar liar liar no more bullshit

L:
Hey girl my destiny 不要嘗試尋找道路進入我的心裡
因為最後你會發現我的好多秘密
搞到身不由己愛上我就I'm sorry

Hey girl, my chili 想要親吻你的臉頰不知可不可以
拜託不要拒絕我的心臟特別迷你
我想告訴你的秘密就是我喜歡你

曾經既我 唔知乜野叫做愛情
玩過 跌過 痛過
不知如何悔過
睇我平時比較細個其實經歷都比你多
只係平時既我 比較冷漠

如果時間可以將佢回到過去
我會好好把握唔會再次令你心碎
將你緊緊捉住唔會比你離我而去
咁樣我地就可以唔再後悔

L:
請你真的不要再次出現在我夢裡
讓我一直一直一直一直的看到你
我想成為黑色當你閉眼就能看得到
永遠做你心中黑暗騎士

D:
請你不要拋棄 那段美好回憶
好想一直一直一直一直跟你一起
彩色缺了光線才會變黑
沒有翅膀的我 不能飛

D:
困在這城牆 太惆悵 懼怕愛情失去方向
在這山丘之間 崎嶇不坦 答應和你攀上
你知道 記憶中某年某月某日
我與你翩翩起舞同溜過冰川 wo
你說心中的花兒 漂亮得總會帶著刺
彼此的猜疑 卻不顧一切再嘗試
從未來看見那風箏已遠飛
請不要再拖 斷線把我心死
you are my nic
這習慣染太壞
風吹散了太快
I am breathing in
near your empty seat every single night
Paracetamol make me wanna sui
Leave it up to you, shut me up all quiet
You just need a man, said it Valentine you liar
I am addicted addicted..yeh yeh

1. 0:00 good sleep（安眠）
2. 0:26 comfortable（快適）
3. 0:53 healing（癒し）
4. 1:11 relaxation（休息）
5. 1:34 satisfying（満足）
6. 2:04 peace of mind（安心）
7. 2:35 quiet（平穏）
8. 2:51 deep breathing（深呼吸）
9. 3:24 meditation（瞑想）
10. 3:50 good night（おやすみなさい）

#ASMR #快眠 #音フェチ