There’s rhythm in writing! 🎶
這個禮拜Presentality的Andrew來分享英文寫作的節奏!
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我的工作需要看非常多的英文。
其中有英文母語的人寫的,也有非母語的人寫的。最近,我注意到一個兩者之間很明顯的差別。這個差別很少有人提到,因為它無關文法正確,也不是有學問的用語,或是文雅的詞彙。
是句子的長短。
Well,更正確的來說,是長句跟短句的交錯。我發現,非母語人士寫的英文句子,不但比英文母語的人寫的長,而且是大部分句子都很長。
母語的人,尤其是很會寫的人,則是會把長句跟短句混合搭配。
那又怎樣?
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你可能會說 ok,以英文為母語的人比較會用短的句子,那又怎樣?句子的長短,跟我寫作的好壞,有關嗎?
關係可大了。
就像音樂,或是影片,文字也是「內容」。只要是「內容」,就有它的節奏。你可以想像一首曲子,從頭到尾都是很長的音,而且一點變化都沒有嗎?或是一部很長的影片,從頭到尾都是很長的畫面,而且一點節奏的變化都沒有嗎?
Well actually,你應該可以想像,這些就是要幫助我們睡眠的。
如果你不想要你的讀者覺得無聊或甚至睡著,我建議適度變換你文字的節奏。
但我們先看案例。
我拿一篇台灣人寫的文,跟另一篇美國人寫的,來做比較:把每個句子都分拆成不同的段落,句子的長短就一目了然了。
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但我們先看案例。
我拿一篇台灣人寫的文,跟另一篇美國人寫的,來做比較:把每個句子都分拆成不同的段落,句子的長短就一目了然了。
📌 台灣案例:Taipei Times Opinion
1. The TAIEX last month rose above 17,000 points as rallies in steel, shipping and some non-tech stocks offset a weakness in semiconductor and electronics stocks.
2. While news about a cluster of local COVID-19 infections connected with China Airlines cargo pilots and a hotel in Taoyuan fueled selling pressure early this month and pushed the local stock market into consolidation mode, the daily market turnover in the first two trading sessions of this month hit fresh highs.
3. Moreover, Taiwan’s stock trading volume last month began to surpass that of Hong Kong for the first time in 15 years, which was beyond most market participants’ expectations.
4. Taiwan’s daily market turnover exceeding Hong Kong’s might gradually become a new normal from this year, and there are good reasons for this.
5. First, Hong Kong’s stock market has lost its appeal to foreign investors since China last year imposed national security legislation on the territory, triggering a potential flight of capital and talent.
6. Second, many wealthy Taiwanese tend to park their overseas funds in Hong Kong, China, Singapore, Switzerland and the US, but government statistics showed that more than 80 percent of funds repatriated by wealthy individuals last year were from Hong Kong, as they saw the political situation in the territory worsen after its self-governance, human rights and freedom of speech were further suppressed.
7. Third, China’s new NASDAQ-style stock board — the Shanghai Stock Exchange’s STAR board — has emerged as a fast-growing capital markets center for Chinese companies at a time when rising China-US tensions have triggered concerns about their prospects of listing in New York, posing a growing challenge to the Hong Kong stock exchange.
8. On the other hand, Taiwan’s economic fundamentals, the central bank’s adoption of extraordinary monetary easing and the government’s fiscal policies have fueled continued rallies in the nation’s stock market since last year.
9. It might be too early to tell how long the consolidation trend might last, as a resurgent COVID-19 outbreak is coloring the global economic outlook, but some insight can be drawn from the stock market:
10. Taiwan’s GDP grew a larger-than-expected 8.16 percent in the first quarter, as exports and private investment remained healthy.
都是一堆很長的句子對不對?我們來看美國人寫的句子,也是一個主流媒體的 opinion 文。
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📌 美國案例:New York Times Opinion
1. I miss torturing Liz Cheney.
2. But it must be said that the petite blonde from Wyoming suddenly seems like a Valkyrie amid halflings.
3. She is willing to sacrifice her leadership post — and risk her political career — to continue calling out Donald Trump’s Big Lie.
4. She has decided that, if the price of her job is being as unctuous to Trump as Kevin McCarthy is, it isn’t worth it, because McCarthy is totally disgracing himself.
5. It has been a dizzying fall for the scion of one of the most powerful political families in the land, a conservative chip off the old block who was once talked about as a comer, someone who could be the first woman president.
6. How naïve I was to think that Republicans would be eager to change the channel after Trump cost them the Senate and the White House and unleashed a mob on them.
7. I thought the Donald would evaporate in a poof of orange smoke, ending a supremely screwed-up period of history.
8. But the loudest mouth is not shutting up.
9. And Republicans continue to listen, clinging to the idea that the dinosaur is the future.
10. “We can’t grow without him,” Lindsey Graham said.
📌 Note: 即使是比較長的句子,這位作者也會用標點符號拆散它:She is willing to sacrifice her leadership post — and risk her political career — to continue calling out Donald Trump’s Big Lie. 這就好比用句點一樣,讓我們讀起來有點停頓休息的時間。
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📌 注意到了嗎?
台灣人寫的英文,句子都偏長,而且長度都差不多。
美國人寫的就不一樣了:一個只有五個字的句子開頭,然後一堆稍微長一點的句子,然後再來一串短句。
你可能懷疑我故意挑選很極端了例子出來,而且幹嘛專門打台灣人呢?
所以想到這裡,我從我的書架上,隨便挑了兩本跟科技有關的書出來。左邊的,是美國人,矽谷知名投資人 Peter Thiel。右邊的是德國人,但注意了,是一個英文非常好的德國人。他不但是世界經濟論壇的創辦人,研究所也是在哈佛大學唸的。
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📌 兩本書 Introduction 是怎麼寫的?
Klaus Schwab (德國):
Of the many diverse and fascinating challenges we face today, the most intense and important is how to understand and shape the new technology revolution, which entails nothing less than a transformation of humankind.
We are at the beginning of a revolution that is fundamentally changing the way we live, work, and relate to one another.
In its scale, scope and complexity, what I consider to be the fourth industrial revolution is unlike anything humankind has experienced before.
Peter Thiel (美國):
Whenever I interview someone for a job, I like to ask this question: "What important truth do very few people agree with you on?"
The question sounds easy because it's straightforward.
Actually, it's very hard to answer.
It's intellectually difficult because the knowledge that everyone is taught in school is by definition agreed upon.
See the difference?
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📌 如何變換節奏呢?
需要Andrew的完整分享請留言「There’s rhythm in writing~」。
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【PRC夠了啦~ Let Taiwan Help】
當全世界都知道,中方的惡意阻擋是「世界衛生組織」(WHO)未能將台灣完整納入技術性討論的主要障礙,BUT,中華人民共和國外交部居然說:「已經對台灣參與全球衛生事務做出妥善安排」(讓我翻個白眼先),這凸顯中國政府公然說謊、誤導國際社會,不斷打壓台灣人民的健康人權。
「一中原則」作為阻止台灣貢獻國際的說法已是陳腔濫調,中國持續將政治凌駕於健康人權的霸道行徑,外交部對此予以強烈譴責。
只有台灣的民選政府才能在「世界衛生組織」及其他國際組織代表台灣2,350萬人民;台灣人民的健康人權由我國政府來守護,中國無權、也無能力代勞。
台灣有能力也有意願協助全世界,以台灣成功的防疫經驗,參與WHO,一定能做出更多貢獻。
#LetTaiwanHelp
.
.
#Taiwan does not belong to the PRC, and any claim to the contrary is a shameless lie, as the whole world is doubtless already aware. Nor did the PRC make any "appropriate arrangement" for Taiwan to avail of global public health mechanisms in the midst of the pandemic. This too is a shameless lie. Taiwan's pandemic management is being run by the Taiwan government and on principles, such as #democracy, #freedom #transparency and concern for #HumanRights, that are incompatible with the authoritarian rule in the PRC!
Using the anachronistic cliche that is the "One China Principle" as a way to prevent Taiwan from contributing to global public health is putting politics head of health and human rights. The 23.5 million people of Taiwan should have representation in an organization like the WHO that claims to #LeaveNoOneBehind.
It's hard to find a more appropriate definition for "shameless lie" than these claims by the PRC.
human rights definition 在 Campus TV, HKUSU 香港大學學生會校園電視 Facebook 的最佳貼文
【毋忘831太子站一週年】本台記者單獨採訪 期間被警方票控
(Please scroll down for English Version)
網民於本日(30日)發起旺角「毋忘831太子站一週年」活動,本台記者於朗豪坊採訪時被警方以違反「限聚令」為由票控。
約下午6時,防暴警察於朗豪坊麥當勞外截查數名市民。本台記者在約10-15米距離外觀察現場情況期間,被另一隊警員包圍及檢查身分證。一名傳媒聯絡組警員得悉本台記者身份後,曾允許記者離開,惟本台記者其後被另一名警員截停及再次帶回原本的位置進行搜查。據本台記者所述,警方於攔截期間曾拒絕在場媒體採訪及拍攝,本台記者亦在警員脅逼下關閉其攝影器材。於歷時45分鐘的搜查期間,本台記者再次被要求檢查身分證及登記身份,經過搜身後才被告知違反限聚令,最後於朗豪坊NARS外被票控。
本台記者當時身穿反光衣並佩戴記者證,亦正履行記者職責──記錄現場情況,理應不受限聚令規管(599G附表1豁免羣組聚集:4. 在工作地點為工作而進行的羣組聚集)。該記者亦單獨進行採訪,身邊只有另一名記者進行採訪工作,並不符合群組聚集的定義,警方並沒有合理的票控理由。
本台強烈譴責警方阻礙採訪自由。本台必須重申,當時記者正履行其職責,警方根本沒有合理理由票控記者。根據香港記者協會聲明,採訪及新聞自由均受《基本法》第 27 條、《基本法》第 39 條訂明的《公民權利和政治權利國際公約》第 19(2) 條及《香港人權法案》保障。「採訪」本身是一種公民權利,並非特定資格。不論記者的身份是學生、義工或是受僱於傳媒機構,均有權進行採訪。
【One year anniversary of the 8.31 Attack at Prince Edward Station】 While reporting by himself, Campus TV's reporter was issued a penalty ticket.
Netizens called for commemorating the one year anniversary of the 8.31 Attack at Prince Edward Station today (30/8). Campus TV's reporter was issued a penalty ticket for violating the group gathering restriction by the police.
At around 6 pm, police stopped and searched several citizens outside of McDonald’s in Langham Place. While observing the scene at a distance of around 10-15 meters, Campus TV’s reporter was encircled by the police and had his ID card checked. An officer from the Police Public Relations Branch allowed and accompanied our reporter to leave after learning about his identity. Yet, our reporter was intercepted by another PPRB officer and ordered to return to the original area where a search was conducted. According to our reporter, the police did not allow reporters who were present to film or report during the interception. Our reporter was coerced to shut down his camera. In the 45 minutes of interception, our reporter had once again had his identity card checked and registered. Only after being searched was our reporter informed of violating the group gathering restriction, he was issued a penalty ticket outside of NARS in Langham Place at last.
Our reporter was wearing a reflective vest and a press card at that time. Fulfilling the duties of a reporter — reporting the scene — should under no circumstances be regulated by the group gathering restriction. (Exempted group gatherings from Schedule 1 of Cap. 599G: 4. Group gathering at a place of work for the purposes of work) Our reporter was also carrying out his work alone and only had one reporter beside him, which did not meet the definition of a group gathering. Hence, there is no justifiable reason for the police to penalize him.
Campus TV strongly condemns the police’s interference in press freedom, and hereby reiterates that our reporter was fulfilling his duties. The police therefore have no justifiable reason to penalise him. According to a statement from HKJA, the freedom of the press and media’s freedom of reporting are guaranteed by Article 7 of the Basic Law, Article 19(2) of “International Covenant on Civil and Political Rights” prescribed by Article 39 of the Basic Law and the “Hong Kong Human Rights and Democracy Act”. News reporting in itself is a form of civil rights instead of a special qualification. Whether a reporter’s identity is a student, a volunteer, or an employee of a media organization, they have the right to report news.
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